i who have died am alive again today

Why hello, blog-world! I'm just writing a quick post to let you all know that I am not, in fact, dead. Here's what I've been up to:

Number of states visited: 6

Number of miles traveled: 3643 (Yes, we need another oil change. It lasted 1 month.)

Needless to say, I have been slightly busy. I left Denver in mid-July and traveled to the following places:
Kalona, IA
West Unity, OH
Shillington, PA
Goshen, IN
Angola, IN
Omaha, NE

There was first a family reunion in PA, followed by fanatic wedding prep in OH, followed by said wedding in Goshen, IN.

And what a wedding it was! I will devote at least one real post to the wedding, but it's taking some time to process. I hate hate hate using the word 'perfect,' but our wedding was seriously just that. Yeah, it rained in the morning and my carefully prepared reception set-up didn't go just as planned and there was a broken window at the church--but it was perfect. The ceremony is vividly sewed to my mind, and I remember almost every detail. The church was filled with gorgeous singing and people, vivid flowers & paintings. My cheeks ached from smiling. I apparently hit the microphone in my eagerness to kiss my new husband. The reception was beautiful and the food was delicious--I actually ate it!

James and I were completely overwhelmed by the outpouring of love from our family and friends. A few weeks before the wedding, we sent out an email detailing how folks could help out, where to meet, and when. I wasn't really sure if anyone would show up. But oh my goodness, did people show up! We had so much help and everything came together like a dream. I was almost crying because it took approximately 30 minutes to set up the chairs in the church b/c everyone was calmly and diligently helping. The morning of the wedding I was at the cabin with Lindsy to put my bouquet together. At 8 am (!!) around 10 people showed up to move chairs and tables. TEN! And more just kept coming! During the ceremony, we stood at the front of the church for the last hymn, and it was amazing to look across the congregation and know that each person was there for me and James. Amazing.

Also, James and I were both pretty much eerily calm the entire weekend. We got to Goshen on Monday, and got a TON of stuff done. By Wednesday, we had 3 hours to sit around at the library and veg out. On Thursday morning, we looked at each other and could not think of a single thing we HAD to do. So we went to Goshen and sat outside the Brew with friends, just hanging out, laughing and talking. Periodically someone would say, "You're just sitting here. You're so calm. This is amazing!" And it was amazing. Every person we met said, "You seem pretty calm for getting married on Saturday." And then James and I would look at each other and think, "Is there something we're missing? Is there something we should be stressing about?"

We never thought of anything.

I'm not trying to say "We were perfect blah blah no stress blah." But we did not feel the need to take control of everything. Vendors stared at me when I said, "I don't really care. Do what you think would be best." 'I don't care' became my mantra the week before the wedding. Oh, the tent's not in the spot we wanted, but I don't care. It's raining on the morning of my wedding-where's the umbrella? Otherwise, I don't care. Apparently this is crazy wedding talk. Apparently I was supposed to be stressed out and focused on every teensy, bitsy detail. Earlier in the wedding planning, I was afraid I would be stressed about everything. But I wasn't. To any future brides who might possibly be reading this, know that there is hope.

The wedding was beautiful. Now real life is beginning. James and I were pretty grumpy while driving back to Denver. But literally, we drove into Denver and started to smile. And we have been crazy happy ever since. Denver is home. We're working on making our apartment look like a home as well.

Now I have officially written enough. I'm off to look for books and DVDs at the library. More wedding posts soon, I hope!

Love List

Here are some things that I currently love:

1. Dr. Bronner's* Magic Castile soap in Rose. I am not the kind of girl that enjoys smelling like flowers, but the fragrance of this rose soap is so clean (no other way to describe it) that I love it more than any other Dr. Bronner's scent. It really makes my morning shower significantly better. (not to mention that it's completely natural and biodegradable. and not full of scary 10 syllable chemicals.)

2. Tom's of Maine** Original Care deodorant in Calendula. I am a known sweater. I can't be shy about it because it is apparent, and I had decided to just deal with it. But, I'm slowly working on weaning myself off of conventional beauty products full of harmful ingredients (to bodies and the world), so I gave this deodorant a try, with very little hope of success, with it not being an anti-perspirant as well. But it works like a dream, and I'm sweating less than ever. My theory is that my poor little pores can actually breathe, so they aren't retaliating by over-sweating. All you sweaters, give this a try!

3. The Yiddish Policemen's Union by Michael Chabon. I admit. I haven't read the book he's famous for (The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier & Clay) because there is a wait list that I have not become part of. But the Athmar library often has other books by newish authors, so I picked this one up. And I love it. I know so little about Jewish culture, and this is a sort-of crash course, much like Everything is Illuminated. The style is just how I like it--subtly funny, rather sarcastic, and intriguing.

4. Making progress. Seems like the wedding is really starting to come together, and for that I am grateful. Of course, approximately 22 thousand tasks remain and James and I still have to work and all that, but it will come together. I know eventually I will start to panic, but so far I feel good about steadily moving along. Also, I never in a million years could have done this by myself. How does the traditional bride do it? If I didn't have someone else willing to share the workload, we'd never have come this far. So I give thanks for grooms who are willing to do more than just show up. :)

That's it for me. I'm off to pack a few boxes to get them ready for the new house!

*I am in no way a spokesperson for Dr. B. Just read the labels on the bottle and you'll understand why I make this disclaimer.

**Same as above. I couldn't possibly promote such a silly company name for a living.

Lushious Lunch

Sometimes food is so delicious I just have to share. Also, I'd like to take the opportunity to thank both Kate and Erin and our beautiful garden for allowing me to make such a beautiful lunch with ease.

Here's what I consumed today while typing up fact sheets about ticks, mites, and scorpions:

My favorite sandwich: mayo, fresh garden lettuce, sharp cheddar cheese, wheat bread. It sounds almost too simple, but is completely delicious. You can make it with grocery store lettuce but it just won't taste quite as good.

Asian cabbage slaw left over from the dinner I made last night: shredded purple cabbage, grated carrot, diced green onion, chopped cilantro, and toasted, slivered almonds. The dressing is mayo, soy sauce, cider vinegar, sugar, ground ginger, and hot sauce. Yum.

Grapes for dessert.

There's something about fresh flavors that made this lunch totally blow my mind.

Dubious day off thoughts

Way to go, today. Thanks for totally redeeming yourself.

I awoke this morning, thinking it would be an innocent day off from work, a brief respite from small children, invertebrates, and late arrivals. Alas, I started my day on hold with the Apple Store. Never try to resolve your credit card issue on the day the new iPhone is available for purchase, kiddos. Unfortunately, the crisis was once more, unresolved. I hung up, only to have my phone ring again--call from work. No problem, just getting information about tomorrow's work site. I construct a breakfast burrito from the fixings my lovely housemate has created: potatoes and onions, highly seasoned and peppered, a sunny side up egg, fresh cilantro (home grown), tomatoes, and cheese. The phone rings before I take a single bite. My credit card company, with a helpful resolution to the Apple madness (still haven't resolved my order b/c I was unwilling to spend another hour of my day on hold--perhaps tomorrow my new computer will begin to make its way towards my residence). I eat, field another phone call, and finally get in the shower.

I didn't have high hopes for the day, honestly. I felt stressed already. But, my friends, it didn't rain all day today, and we weren't under a tornado watch. A friend from the Western Slope arrived, and we made wine/spirits deliveries, ate a delicious lunch from Mr. Lucky's Sandwiches in Cheesman Park, lounging in the mid-day sun. Capped off by iced mochas with a beautiful friend and an afternoon of book reading in a cool, dark room, I felt much more alive.

The evening only has improved the situation. Homemade pizza with amazing toppings and toothsome crust. Lovely salad greens I picked fresh from the garden just minutes before. Home brewed Belgian wit. Apple cake with ice cream for dessert. Excellent company around the table. I finished my book, and am now geared up for a morning of work.

Thanks again, today. We'll see what tomorrow holds for me.

Check check and check.

Shoes? check.

Jewelry? check.

Dress fitting #1? check.

I promise, someday I will be able to talk about something other than weddings. But I went to my dress fitting today and it was really fun. My dress is lovely. It's going to fit me really well, and is still comfortable (other than being made from a warm fabric). Yay!

I have fully entered the "good enough" phase. I ordered two pairs of earrings from Ten Thousand Villages, and took them to my dress fitting today. One pair looked just ok. The other pair looked pretty good. And those are officially the earrings. Because I am no longer interested in looking at all the choices out there, I just want to be done and to cross the next item off the list. It feels really freeing, because I am able to be decisive. Everything moves us one step closer to actually getting married!

My whirlwind weekend is only beginning: tonight, we'll work on our wedding ceremony & pack for our trip to KS. Tomorrow AM we'll drive to Kansas, have a pre-wedding BBQ with friends, and camp with friends. Then on Sunday, Emily & Andy get married, and as soon as the ceremony ends, James and I drive back to Denver. Bright and early at 8 am on Monday morning, I teach my first summer camp. Wish me luck!

Classic Over-Thinker

Classic Over-Thinker should be stamped permanently on my resume' and any business cards I happen to procure in the future. And I can over-think about basically anything: will my teaching license renewal be submitted before the expiration date? Will my acne choose to flare up for the wedding? Will Target let us return some glasses without a receipt?

Currently, wedding shoes are the bane of my existence. I wish I already owned a fabulous, comfortable, and colorful pair of shoes, b/c really, if I had something suitable I wouldn't look for something new. I love shoe shopping and shoes in theory. Then I go to an actual store and put some shoes on my feet, and my rather short and quite wide feet do not fit. I have to have a conversation with my brain about how I cannot will them to fit me every time I try on a new item of footwear.

I acknowledge that I'm over-thinking this. As soon as I settle on some wedges with height, I think that I won't be comfortable. But most often comfort = expensive. And I find that the majority of my current comfortable shoe needs are met (aka investing in a new pair of worthy shoes doesn't make a lot of sense right now). So what to do? I am officially tired of looking for shoes, and every time I do look, the sensible part of my brain announces that I am over-thinking a tiny decision and that the whole thing is ridiculous because my dress is ankle-length. But is it so wrong to want something colorful peering out of that dress? And to feel a little tall and confident?

See? Classic over-thinking behavior, as I have now devoted an entire blog entry to my plight. Basically, I need to stop thinking about it and just purchase a pair of shoes. Or reassess and see if in fact, I can use something I currently own. I pride myself on staying away from wedding porn and the like, but even on the alternative/DIY blogs I read, each (aka most, not all) bride has killer vintage fashion sense and excellent, full of personality footwear. These same brides search antique shops for months for vintage table linens and full sets of unmatched plates in the same color scheme. Sometimes these brides inspire me, but when I start to over-think, I feel inadequate. But that's just not my style. I'm a good enough kind of person. Are the invites cut relatively straight? Will the post office be able to decipher my handwriting? If both of the above are true, good enough. Don't get me wrong, I take pride in my work. It's not shoddy, just not absolutely the awesomest ever. Currently, I have visions of indie brides with delicious, amazing shoes. And suddenly I need them too.

Except I don't. Which I will eventually remember and find something that fits at least one of my many criteria (relatively comfortable, if not flats, something that doesn't sink into grass, colorful, will wear again) and feel good enough about it.

Until then, the over-thinking continues.

P.S. James and I really did complete the invitations from start to finish this weekend. It wasn't even terribly time-consuming, and was actually kind of fun. We're now hand-addressing envelopes, and will mail them off into the wilds shortly!

Wedding Not-Wednesday

I haven't talked about the wedding in a little while, but today, I just had to share. When I checked my email this morning, right there in between the Snapfish photo offers and the Barnes and Noble coupon was a little email that made my heart leap.

Rings are done! is what it said. We're having our rings made by a local artist in Goshen, and she finished them over the weekend! All we need to do is send the remainder of our bill, and the rings are ours! These little concrete (or white gold in this case) bits of our upcoming marriage are what get me really excited. It's really happening! And we're going to have beautiful rings, which I can't wait to see!